DIRECTOR’S NOTES

 

In late 2002, my friend Robert Boulanger told me that Peter Berlin lived in the apartment below his. My memory of Berlin’s image and photographs were vague, though I knew who he was and how famous he had been in the 1970s. I remembered seeing him on the streets in the 1980s when I moved to San Francisco. But I certainly wasn’t a fan nor was I particularly interested in porn or porn stars. However, when Robert started relating the stories Peter had been telling him—about Robert Mapplethorpe, Rudolf Nureyev, Andy Warhol, and about the immense loss of his friends to AIDS—I knew these stories need to be captured somehow.

 

Meeting Peter for the first time was intimidating and, although Robert had explained to Peter that I was a filmmaker and writer and that I was interested in possibly doing a documentary about him, it took me three meetings before I could even mention what I wanted to do. Peter seemed bored with the image of “Peter Berlin” and while he didn’t refuse my request, he didn’t seem very interested either. He made it clear he didn’t like to plan in advance and the idea that I would need any sort of commitment from him was met with dismissal. It was clear I would have to shoot on short notice and without a crew.

 

We eventually shot over 40 hours of interviews in the course of 18 months and the more we got together and talked on camera, the less reserved Peter became. Never one to mince words, Peter initially didn’t want to talk about the things I felt were interesting or important—his films, his photographs, what San Francisco and New York were like in the 1970s and 80s. Instead he wanted to talk about politics, world events, and his favorite television shows. I just let him talk. Eventually, he opened up and spoke freely. I just had to wait until he was ready.

 

Then the photographs, film canisters, and videotapes started appearing from under his bed and from out of his closet. He presented them to me almost as an afterthought. “Ja,” he would say, “maybe this might be interesting.” Hundreds of slides, prints, and negatives, reels of apparently undeveloped 16mm film from the 1960s and 1970s, and hours of 3/4” and Hi 8 videos were made available, piled onto Peter’s enormous bed, which takes up almost the entire room.

 

When I had the 16mm reels transferred to video, I was amazed at what had lain unseen for almost 40 years - Peter walking the streets of Paris, Peter cruising the Castro at sunrise, Peter masturbating on a train from Germany to France. Peter, too, was surprised. Some of the film he didn’t even remember. Then we watched the videos of Fire Island, of New York lofts and vacations on Long Island, and of Peter posing, strutting, and climaxing for the camera. It was clear I had an embarrassment of riches to consider and a daunting editing task ahead of me.


I started this project with no plan, no budget, and no crew. I just had a fascinating man as the subject and more raw materials than I could possibly use. On my Mac G4 laptop, I cut together a 30 minutes demo reel and showed it to Lawrence Helman, a long-time fan of Peter’s whom I had interviewed for the documentary. Lawrence was also a producer who had tried to get Peter interested in a similar project several years ago to no avail. Lawrence saw something in the jumble of scenes that excited him and before I knew it, I had a co-producer with a rolodex as big as his enthusiasm.

 

We begged, borrowed, bartered, and tried to get discounts wherever we could. Lawrence lined up interviews with celebrities and negotiated rights and permissions. I holed up with my laptop, dozens of tapes, and hundreds of scanned photographs at Dorland Mountain Arts Colony in Southern CA, cutting the documentary together and slowly giving it shape.

 

One of the unique aspects of Dorland is its complete lack of electricity. It brings one in tune with the natural rhythms of nature and allows creativity to blossom. I’d been there before, completing a draft of a novel, but to my knowledge, no one had tried to edit a video there before. Armed with an adaptor plugged into my rental car’s cigarette lighter, I would recharge the laptop battery every night and every afternoon. Even with my recharging routine, I could only get four hours of editing done in each 24-hour period. And yet, the lack of distractions made those four hours as productive as two weeks would have been at home.

 

Back in the land of electricity, I continued cutting, interrupted occasionally by Peter’s discovery of more film and more photographs from the depths of his closet. Each new discovery required rethinking large sections of the documentary and re-editing. In previous writing and editing projects, I had always started with a clear structure. This video was different - growing organically, the story emerging from the mass of golden archival material, a little at a time.

 

In retrospect, I don’t think That Man: Peter Berlin could have been made in any other way. Making the documentary was, like Peter’s life and image, a journey of discovery and re-creation.

 

Jim Tushinski